Monthly Archives: January 2011

Blogging up your Arteries…

February. The hottest month in South Africa.

The coldest month in the Northern Hemisphere, Which is just a double whammy. It’s Valentine’s Day, AND it’s cold. You want to stay indoors on the couch with a loved one when it’s cold. You are further reminded of your solitude in winter.

But Summer, oh summer. – Yet another reason to Live in Cape Town.

Cape Town, Oh Cape Town. Let me count the ways...

SInce I mentioned the ‘V Day’ word, you might think that this is worrying me and that I’m a love and bunnies kinda girl…

I know a bunch of people who would spray coffee out of their noses with laughter (presuming they were drinking coffee at the time that they read this) at the notion of me being a cushy girl who loves cheesy, romantic gestures. No, I am known by those who think they know me best as a ‘man-eater’… and not in the literal sense because last time I checked, Cannabalism was illegal in most of the known countries of this planet.
No, apparently I take men’s hearts and best intentions and break them.. or eat them if we are keeping with the literal sense.

Again, I feel this is a very harsh judgement and not one tiny bit true. The reverse happens to me much more, thus disproving the rule. Those people who know me even better than the aforementioned people who THINK they know me really well, will attest to the fact that, although cheese does make me cringe – and I’d rather be teased and high-fived than adored and serenaded by violin –  I am actually as big and kooshy as a big kooshy teddy bear. Or a big kooshy blonde girl, who is just on the wrong side of kooshy and wishes she was slightly more lithe and toned than big and kooshy, but that’s why Quentin Chong takes money out of my account every month so I can kick ass and take names at the Muay Thai Gym – Dragon Power (more on that soon.)

Well valentines day is this month. but I say “Bah humbug” to that consumerist nonsense.

Although, on consumerism: I think the mall should have a cupid whose lap you can sit on and tell him who you’d like for Valentine’s Day.

Yes, there is an arrow in my pocket. No I'm not happy to see you.

In case you are blessed, like I am, to be single on Valentine’s day. Then please, oh please, let’s high-five and be awesome out in public. Do not hide behind a bucket of Ice-cream and Robert Pattinson movies. (Athough, that sounds divine… Do that the next night!)

Hear me out though, because if you go out partying on valentines day, you can be assured that all the guys you meet are single and there will be no girlfriends lurking at home or (worse) around the corner where they just nipped off to the bathroom, only to return with fire blazing in their eyes with enough intensity to give you blind spots whenever you look at a man for sheer fear of eliciting a similar response…ever again.
So yes, no couples clubbing on valentines day. They will all be safely tucked on their couches watching romantic DVD’s or in cliched restaurants eating expensive dinners that are best eaten out of take out boxes on comfy couches watching dvd’s where you can throw your head back and laugh your mannish laugh without worrying about disturbing that doe-eyed couple in the corner who appear to be reciting sugary love sonnets to each other with chubby cherubs floating naked above them.

SO wear your high-heels (unless you’re a dude… although, what ever floats your boat) and high-five a random stranger.

This is the most free you are ever going to be, single compadres.

And non-single readers, the fact that you have read all the way to the end of this post shows me that there is perhaps some latent emotions there… hrm… good luck with that, and enjoy the sugar rush.

high-five!


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